Emotional Mirroring to Build Connection

You can use emotional mirroring to build connection at work.

Many people feel uncertain of how to respond when someone is experiencing strong emotions.

“What do I do?”

“What do I say?”

When another person is feeling mad/sad/hurt/overwhelmed/happy, they want to know that you “see” them.

This is where emotional mirroring helps.

Here is how it works: pay attention to the type/tone of emotion that is being expressed.

For example, does the person seem angry? Can you see frustration in their body language and hear it in their words?

Take note of the emotion and then say it back to them, “That sounds really frustrating!”

This sort of a response avoids judgment and shows that you are paying attention (which is key to expressing care). And it gives you good information, letting you know the emotion that is at play.

After practicing this technique for a month, a client came back, amazed, and said, “My team thinks I’m so much better at listening!”

Sidenote: You might not always get the emotion right. You might say, “That sounds frustrating (or another feeling) and the person will respond with a correction like, “Actually, I’m mostly sad.” If this happens, embrace the pivot and mirror the updated emotion.