Fix-It Frank
It is so tempting to launch into fix-it mode, especially at work. But people want to be seen and heard more than they want to be fixed.
If you are in a leadership position, your likelihood of being a Fix-It Frank (or Francine) only increases, because we love promoting people who solve problems and get things done.
A helpful turn of phrase is to ask the other person, “Would you like for me to troubleshoot with you or just listen?” This will get you better information – and, once the other person is acknowledged, they are more likely to be able to shift into a generative, problem-solving mode.
Fix-It Franks can also err by offering their suggestions too early, disrupting the other person’s problem-solving capacities.
After the other person has been heard, tap into their experiential knowledge by asking, “What is a good next step for you right now?”
or
“When have you gone through something like this before? What did you learn about yourself?”